This year, Anna Lidén made her debut as an author with the autobiographical book Blunda och tänk på något annat (eng. Close Your Eyes and Think About Something Else). In it, she recounts her journey into prostitution and drug addiction, as well as the long and challenging road to escaping exploitation. “The book is well-written and balanced. Highly recommend!’ writes Robert Schenck in his review.
Book Review
Blunda och tänk på något annat
by Anna Lidén
Lind & Co AB, Stockholm, 2024
Reading Blunda och tänk på något annat is like accompanying the author, Anna Lidén, on a harrowing journey into hell. At just 17 years old, Anna begins selling her body, but the roots of her descent are already laid bare in the vivid narrative of Part 1, ‘Alltings början’ (eng. ‘The Beginning of Everything’).
I was born at Södersjukhuset in Stockholm on January 10, 1988, entering the world with a loud cry for attention. … As children, my little sister and I are quite similar. We both spend our free time dancing, excel in school, and play musical instruments. I often bring home corrected exams with perfect scores, but the validation I yearn for almost always eludes me. … I have never spent time alone with my father. … The thought feels uncomfortable, as he is almost like a stranger to me. He is always present but remains someone I don’t really know. … My parents support my activities—I dance, act in theater, ride horses, and write. Yet I can’t shake the feeling that they see these pursuits more as a convenient way to keep me occupied for a few hours a week. … My need for validation grows, and eventually, I find that any attention—good or bad—is better than none at all.
The need for affirmation propels her into a swift and merciless descent. As a 13-year-old, Anna goes to Niklas’s house, 17 years old, and is raped, and afterwards viciously bullied by her peers. During her teenage years, she leads a promiscuous lifestyle. One afternoon, she enters Aftonbladet’s chat and receives a response from JockeM08. The need for validation resurfaces, and soon 17-year-old Anna becomes trapped in an intensely destructive relationship. Jocke ensures that she becomes addicted to drugs, leaving her in a constant state of financial dependence. He then begins exploiting her by selling her body. Anna reflects, I’ve been fooling around for years, so what’s the shame in making money from it? However, life as a prostitute brings only misery, and Anna becomes a victim of severe violence as well as her worsening drug and alcohol addiction. This downward spiral leads to severe mental illness, a suicide attempt she miraculously survives, and eventually, time in prison.
Amidst the depths of her misery, she enrolls in the Writers’ Academy at Folkuniversitetet in Stockholm. There, she eventually meets 30-year-old Tommie, who will become her future husband. The downward spiral begins to level out, but she remains trapped in her personal hell for several more years. However, meeting Tommie marks the starting point of a challenging, long, and arduous journey toward reclaiming a human life. Tommie’s unwavering—and almost superhuman—patience enables Anna, over time, to connect with therapists whose professionalism and compassion help guide her on the path upward and forward. Finding the right therapists has not been easy, as her previous experiences with mental health care have been a complete failure. Meanwhile, Tommie and their two children endure immense suffering as Anna’s drug and alcohol addiction persists. However, through therapy, Anna gradually gains self-awareness, and eventually, she manages to overcome her drug addiction, leaving ‘only’ the alcohol. But even that is far from simple.
Today, the author is a sober alcoholic who describes herself as a ‘strong and confident mother.’ She lectures and serves as a board member of the organization Inte Din Hora.This is a description of Anna Lidén’s story—a narrative that, beyond its details, captivates with its balanced and compelling portrayal. What makes the book so worth reading is the way it follows a ‘logical’ course, beginning with her birth and unfolding through the events that shaped her life. Anna’s journey, both in therapy and in life, continues to this day. It is through Lidén’s newfound self-awareness, gained from therapy and her processing of past traumas, that this book emerges as a mature and profoundly truthful account.
The atrocities described in the book are difficult to comprehend, yet they highlight a grim reality that far too many in our society fail to grasp—the true nature of paid sexual assault. This is precisely why Blunda och tänk på något annat is a book that deserves to be widely read.
Anna Lidén has written this book for her ‘sisters who are currently fighting for their lives,’ expressing her deepest hope that they too will one day find the long and challenging path to a dignified existence.
Here is an interview with Anna Lidén, where she shares more about her journey and the story behind her book.
Three other books by women who have escaped prostitution (reviews available on this website):
Paid For – My Journey Through Prostitution by Rachel Moran
Prostitution Narratives, stories of survival in the sex trade by Caroline Norma and Melinda Tankard Reist, (red.)
Till männen som köpte min kropp by Louise Amcoff, as told to Tove Sahlin
